TBI Q&A: Writer Nick Ward

Writer Nick Ward describes how a ‘hilarious argument’ with Kathryn Burnett about who was the most popular screenwriting tutor, led to co-writing their first theatrical romantic comedy Mike & Virginia.

Nick also reveals how a second-hand hubcap shop and a bird called Neil averted a crisis of confidence, by reminding him of the ‘landing strip of ideas’.

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Premiering on April 30, as part of the NZ International Comedy Festival 2011, this fast-paced romantic comedy follows Mike and Virginia, both film lecturers, both single, both on the cusp of 40.

The story has attracted Te Radar as the Director, comedian Michele A’Court and well known actors Lisa Chappell, Stephen Papps and Will Hall.

During what hours of the day do you feel most inspired?

Tough one to answer that. Inspiration can come at any hour. Ideas are circling and my welcome mat is always out. One of the questions I get asked the most is "where do your ideas come from?" Usually I simply say: "I steal them from other people."

But the truth is I have no real idea at all. Many years ago I remember hearing a very successful writer speak and he said he never has any ideas, he simply spends all his time preparing a runway for the ideas to land. At the time I thought he was just giving us a glib answer. However in my years as a paid writer I have come to believe him. I say "paid" writer not to show off or let you all know that I get paid to do this but to remind you (as I do to myself daily) that the roof over my head and food in my belly is reliant on the words I produce. No words - no beer and biscuits. So my door is always open.

How would a good friend describe your aesthetic or style?

A sloth on a four-day red bull and bargain book bin bender.

What aspect of your creative practice gives you the biggest thrill?

When the words I put on a page connect with the reader. Simple as that.

How does your environment affect your work?

I don’t like being around wet dogs when I’m trying to write. Or big explosions.

Do you like to look at the big picture or focus on the details?

Big picture baby. All the way.

What's your number one business tip for surviving (and thriving) in the creative industries?

Develop a thick skin. When someone critics your work never, ever take it personally.

Which of your projects to date has given you the most satisfaction?

Mike & Virginia is a play I’ve written with Kathryn Burnett. It’s my best undiluted work. It’s pure, funny and moving. It opens on Saturday night.

Who or what has inspired you recently?

Watching the cast and crew putting together Mike & Virginia. They are utterly driven and utterly inspiring. Can you tell I’m excited about the production?

Tell us a bit about your background.

My past is a series of half-truths and conflicting stories. All of which are true and all of which are complete lies. I started writing because I wasn’t any good at anything else and since 1993 I have made a living from writing and nothing else. If you want to write then write. And write every day.

Tell us a bit about the show (inception to conception)

The show started when Kathryn Burnett and I were taking a car journey and we started having a conversation about whose students liked them better. We were both teaching screenwriting at the time. It turned into a hilarious argument and by the end of the journey we both looked at each other and said - there’s a story in this.

So were born Mike and Virginia two film studies lecturers who hate each other and then the worse possible thing happens - they fall in love. It’s a romantic comedy about romantic comedies so it gives us the chance to explore and deconstruct the way romantic comedies work and have a fun time doing it. Honestly we were laughing until we cried some days working on this show. I know that will make its way onto the stage thanks to the team bringing it to life.

For the record my students like me better.

If you could go back and choose a completely different career path to the one you've chosen, what would it be?

Crime-solving rock star.

What place is always with you, wherever you go?

Disneyland.

What's the best way to listen to music, and why?

The best way to listen to music is cranked up loud as I blast down state highway one in my Holden Kingswood.

You are given a piece of string, a stick and some fabric. What do you make?

A cure for the common cold.

What's the best stress relief advice you've ever been given?

My Dad said this to me when I was a kid - “If you can’t fight then wear a big hat”.

What's great about today?

Today is yesterday’s tomorrow.

What’s your big idea for 2011?

Recently I had a huge crisis of faith. I was so utterly and completely cut down by one person’s comments that I was literally unable to work. In fact I hated facing the blank page. Despised it. The joy was gone. Why write when the work I produce is so under-valued by others? That all the months of effort I put in are seen to be such an utterly worthless contribution to the process of making a film? All it took was one person to cut me down so cruelly and that was it, I couldn't get up again.

If the world doesn't want me to write I won't. And I didn't.

But then something happened that reminded about the landing strip of ideas.

Now bare with me here...

It started with a visit to buy hubcaps. My runabout car (not the Kingswood) is missing a hubcap on the front and the back hubcap is stuffed so I thought a new set would be in order.

There's this place around the corner from me that has always intrigued me. It's a crazy old run-down oil-stained shop with piles and piles of hubcaps and chrome in the window. Second-hand hubcaps. Now I had an excuse to visit the shop and see what it's like inside.

As it happens it was run by a delightful old guy in oily blue overalls with a permanently bemused expression on his face. The place was utterly deserted, there were no lights on, half an engine was lying on the floor as I entered and a car seat was blocking the "press for service" button.

The old guy took ages to emerge from the dark hallway at the back of the shop and when he did it seemed that I had totally inconvenienced him by turning up as a paying customer. Anyway after our transaction was finished I left the shop and walked past the shop next door.

And this little fellow caught my eye. A strange bird with a label around his neck saying "HI" MY NAME IS NEIL!

The shop was a furniture shop selling second-hand restored wooden furniture and nicknacks. I went inside and there was a bloke staining a set of drawers in the main entrance area.

He looked at me and said, "What were you doing next door?"

"Buying hubcaps", I replied.

Given that was all the hubcap shop seemed to sell I would've thought the Stainer could've figured that out himself. He just nodded and went back to his drawers - I was another inconvenient paying customer it seemed.

"What can you tell me about the bird in the window?"

Without looking up the Stainer said:

"I can tell you his name is Neil."

He offered me no further information. And do you know what? That was good enough for me. The little guy was a reasonable price so money changed hands and Neil rode in my passenger seat home. It wasn't until much later that night I realised that the old guy in the oil-soaked shop next door was called "Neil" as well.

So Neil the penguin is now sitting on my bench top at home. Looking at me. I don't know what it is about him but he intrigues me. There's an idea for a story here but I'm just not sure what that story is. But what I do know is that the landing lights are on so my seatbelt is secure, my tray table is folded away and my seat is in the upright position. Prepare for landing.

This year me and Neil will be doing a lot of writing.

• Nick Ward

Nick is currently one of New Zealand's most prolific writers. Nick’s first film Stickmen sold to 26 countries around the world and is widely quoted as a favourite New Zealand film. Nick also has several TV credits including Interrogation and Outrageous Fortune. Nick's film, Second Hand Wedding recently become New Zealand's 7th highest grossing local film. His fourth feature Love Birds has recently been released.

• Kathryn Burnett – Writer/Producer

Kathryn Burnett is a screenwriter, playwright, lecturer and development consultant who has worked primarily in film and television for over 15 years. In 2008/09 she co-created and developed the TVNZ drama The Cult. With significant television writing credits she has developed numerous television series for New Zealand’s major production companies and has worked as a Script Consultant/Story Editor on Love Birds, Dean Spanley, The Ferryman and Poppy. She has also published a book of humourous essays, Has Johnny Come Lately? through HarperCollins.

Further Information: BrainStorm in association with STAMP at THE EDGE presents Mike & Virginia

NZ International Comedy Festival 2011

The Herald Theatre, Aotea Centre, THE EDGE in Auckland from 30 April – 7 May, at 8.30pm (Sunday show 6pm, no show Monday). Tickets are $30.00* and $25.00* concession and available from the Aotea Centre Box Office or on 0800 BUYTICKETS or online at www.buytickets.co.nz (*Booking fees apply).